Today’s potty training was so much worse than I’d hoped it would be. Lilly fussed and moaned and cried and threw fits. I tried to be cheerful and upbeat, but it wore on me badly. To top it off, I had one of my older children questioning my parenting skills. “Can’t you DO anything about her whining?” My response was that I was trying to endure without snapping or yelling. I also told this child that I completely understand what it’s like to have opinions about child rearing when you haven’t had any children. I certainly had lots of ideas and opinions. My children have quickly dissolved all of my wonderful ideas and left me in a puddle of indecision and ineptitude.
By this afternoon, when Lilly was fussing at me, I simply joined her. I started to cry, letting out all of my frustration and irritation with her and the world in general. Interestingly, seeing me in tears startled Lilly enough that she just sat there quietly staring at me. I guess she wasn’t sure what to think.

Unfortunately, the afternoon did not go any better than the morning. And the only thing that made the evening better than the afternoon was that Michael came home and took over with Lilly. He has infinitely more patience with her than I do, and she loves him dearly. I’m just a caretaker.
Now Lilly is in bed for the night, and I’m not hopeful about the prospects for tomorrow. But since I can’t stop the passage of time, tomorrow is inevitable. One consolation is that it can’t possibly be any worse than today.